I'm still shaking. There's always a point, somewhere between realising that you're infected and solving it/giving up, where the idea of deleting all files and programs and factory resetting is announced. A blanket of silence falls across my mind as thousands of people stand, shocked. And the result is scary. Scare. y.

ANTI-VIRUS SYSTEM PRO is a money making program of Satan. It will pop up pretending that it's an anti-virus thing and that your computer is at risk. I have my computer to myself, fortunately, so I recognised it at once as being a scam as I'd never seen the program before. People who share computers or who maybe aren't as familiar with them have to watch out for things like this. Anyway, it'll give you a load of trouble every 10 seconds and stop you doing anything, which conveniently includes real anti-virus or anti-malware programs.

Anyway, if you ever, god forbid, diagnose yourself with ANTI-VIRUS SYSTEM PRO, the program that nearly destroyed the wonderful world of C:\\, a quick guide of what to do. Unplug your internet. Go find another computer. If there isn't another one in the household connected to internet, shut down your computer and see if you can arrange something later with a friend. Either way, download [link] and put it on a flash drive. Go back to your computer and install it. It won't let you open it once installed, so restart your computer. It will give you about 1 minute, depending on computer speeds, to open mbam. Do this, and run a scan. Once scan is complete, agree to quarantine the files, then agree to restart. It should be good from then on. Remember to scan the flash drive and make sure the virus isn't on that.

I hope- or rather, don't- that this will help in the future. Best case scenario: you never need this.